Tuesday, October 29, 2013

18 Years.

This year, especially, my husband and I have been bombarded with this news; couples that have been a constant in our lives, are no longer. It always leaves us shocked, sad, & dumbfounded. I listen to these people and hear the very same situations & feelings we’ve experienced. “What is the tipping point?”, I always wonder. Sometimes I can understand, and sometimes I just don’t get it.

Whatever love gods were at work when Mister & I were “matched”, they were on their “A” game that day. This is not to say it is love rainbows and unicorns over here.
Far, very far, from it. The running anecdote in our house is, “You may not be perfect, but you’re perfect for me.”

{Throw Back--Circa 1993ish}

Yesterday was our 18th wedding anniversary. Statistically speaking, we’ve beaten more than a few odds. You don’t do something for 18 years without learning a little in the process.

 {Throw Back 2009ish}

There’s no magic formula but for us---

-it boils down to 2 words; TRUTH & RESPECT. We’ve been given the opportunity to develop these skills over and over and over again. Every time I run my annoyance or anger through this filter, I can see. I take a deep breath and know the right answer. I know--It’s not rocket science but so hard sometimes. 
To me, marriage is like raising a teenager.
-Pick your battles
-Check in. Let each other know where you are.
-Screw up. Learn. Don’t do it again. Forgive.
-Give space to grow. Together and separately.
-Spend quality time together.
-Tell the truth.
-Trust is something you earn.
-Laugh. Everything is not as serious as it may seem.

Which leaves me with a little love note for the Mister (you can skip reading the rest..)

So this year, Thank you. For making coffee (when you don’t drink it), the “aha moment” reality check, the bike you bought even though you thought it was the stupidest thing on earth just so we could be together, for painting the front door blue (another eyebrow raise), the junking expeditions, the moving of endless boxes, the stars, the poopy green grass on this side of the fence, for realizing what an airport asshole is, & mostly, for this life we’ve created together.


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